Sunday, July 25, 2010

Words women use

This is one of those e-mails that floats around the Internet. My friend Peggy sent it to me with a note, "There's a lot of truth in this." More than you know, Peggy. At one time or another, and sometimes more than once, I have heard one or more of these expressions from a woman. Men, take note. Paying attention may save a relationship, a marriage, or even save you from a night in the doghouse.

(1) "Fine" : This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) "Five Minutes": If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) "Nothing": This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in "fine".

(4) "Go ahead": This is a dare, not permission. Don't do it.

(5) Loud Sigh: This is not a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) "That's okay": This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) "Thanks": A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome'. That will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) "Whatever": Is a woman's way of saying Fuck YOU!

(9) "Don't worry about it, I got it": Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

1 comment:

DEMiller said...

So that's what they were teaching them in Home Economics!