Muggs with mugshots

An article in my local morning newspaper described a dilemma some people find themselves in after being arrested by the police. Their arrest mugshots are shown on various commercial websites. In order to get their picture removed from the website they have to contact another website where, for $399, they can get their mugshot taken off the site. It would obviously behoove anyone in such a situation not to want a prospective employer to google his name, and find him pop up on a mugshot website. So some pay the price. The article goes on to say that some arrestees feel this is a form of extortion. Since the mugshots are part of the public record there is nothing that police agencies can do about the practice except advise, "Don't get arrested."


I agree. But on the other hand I can look at their pictures and think, "Thank god that isn't me!" It has been one of the main goals of my life to never come within whistling distance of a jail, much less a booking picture.

The charges against these individuals are pretty common and boring. They include domestic violence, drugs, DUI. I can make up better charges in my head, just by looking at the those arrested.

For instance, I'd list the charge against these two as BEING STUPEFIED.




For these youngsters I'd throw in a charge of MISTAKENLY THINKING THIS IS A YEARBOOK PICTURE.



There could be a couple of crimes these guys could be charged with, so take your choice: BEING OLD HIPPIES, or LOOKING LIKE DRUG-ADDLED '80S HEAVY METAL SURVIVORS.



Along those lines, these next individuals will definitely go to jail for HAVING A REALLY BAD HAIR DAY.





How about HAVING A REALLY BAD HAIR DAY with an additional charge of SLEEPING THROUGH ARREST AND BOOKING . . .


. . .or ARRESTED, BUT LOOKING GOOD.


This prisoner is being charged with DELIBERATELY RAMMING FACE INTO TOE OF POLICE OFFICER'S BOOT MULTIPLE TIMES.


And finally, this man has been charged with IMPERSONATING A CARTOON CHARACTER.


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