Thursday, December 01, 2011

Horny Herman Cain: lie and deny

J'accuse!

While visiting family over the Thanksgiving holiday I tried to stay away from the news, and especially the Republican presidential circus. It's impossible. News that Herman Cain's mistress of 13 years has come forward was about as surprising as waking up in November to frost on the windowpanes. Rich, powerful men use riches and power to get women. Women fall for it, and men use them.

Like the parallel story of Jerry Sandusky seducing young boys, the Cain story has escalated from its original. As boys come forward about Sandusky, so do women start appearing who have had something to do with Herman Cain. It started out as sexual harassment, then went into his affair. Hm. He's a busy guy, and I don't mean just as CEO of Godfather's Pizza. I wouldn't doubt there are more women out there who just haven't entered the heat of a public spotlight, and maybe they won't. Maybe Cain was depending on silence from ex-girlfriend Ginger White.

Ginger snapped, and Herman flapped!

Here's where Herman has gone wrong. He could have said, "Yes, under the law I probably sexually harassed those women, but like many men I'm confused about what sexual harassment is. I thought I was being charming, but I thought wrong. I apologize for offending these women, and I promise to make sure I understand laws on sexual harassment and won't do it again." If he had, the story might have gone away. Instead, he lied and denied. Bad decision.

When the mistress story came up he said he'd known her for the years she claimed but they didn't have an affair. Nuh-uh, no way, said Herman. But we believe Herman was lying about the sexual harassment, so why not lie about an extramarital affair? He didn't disappoint us. He could have said, "I did have an inappropriate relationship with Ms. White, and it ended some time ago. I'm not proud of myself, knowing Mrs Cain was home stoking the home fires while I stoked the fire in Ms. White." Words to that effect, anyway.

The public isn't fooled. They are more likely to forgive a man if he issues a mea culpa for having an affair than if he lies about it. The list of politicians whose careers were ruined by affairs is long, and yet there is Newt Gingrich, who had affairs, admitted them, and has climbed in the polls, He is stepping over Hormone Cain as Cain trips himself stepping on his own dick.

Untainted (so far) by stories of infidelities are Mitt Romney (faithful Mormon...unless he has another wife somewhere), and candidates scraping along at the bottom of the polls: Ron Paul (this guy doesn't look like he's ever been laid, much less produce a son), Michelle Bachmann (I find it hard to believe anyone would want to have sex with her, but that's just me), Rick Santorum, religious, graduate of the same Catholic school my granddaughters attend, and Jon Huntsman, Jr., who is movie star handsome, like Mitt, but also a devout Mormon. Oh yeah, Rick Perry's in there somewhere, too. He's a good-looking guy, and I suppose he could have lassoed some little filly somewhere along the Chisholm Trail, but so far no one has come forward to say she's seen Rick's six-shooter outside of its holster.

I'd be sweating too if I were you, Herman.

No, Herman "Blame everyone else but me" Cain has left a trail, a history of improper and inappropriate relationships with females. The real Godfather would have made sure there were no witnesses. Apparently Herman has drawn a line, thank god, not depending on such drastic solutions to his problems. He's either paid them off or depended on their silence rather than leaving any witnesses in shallow graves somewhere in the Pine Barrens.

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