A boob looking at boobs

Last Friday I saw Essy, my coworker of many years. I hadn't seen her for a couple of months. Our paths just haven't crossed. Essy was wearing a new spring dress with a low cut front, and was showing some nice cleavage.

This knocked me completely off my pins. In the 28 years I've known Essy, since she was a teen, she has always been a modest dresser. She's always had a sort of casual professional style, even before that was popular. She's cute, but I've never seen her showing so much of herself.

What I did was immediately use my Male Mental Camera. That is, before she saw me coming toward her, I took a mental snapshot of her décolletage and filed it in my brain under "boobs." Later on I downloaded the mental picture file and took a longer look at what I'd seen, long after we'd said our hellos and parted company. The trick was to get that picture, then when talking with Essy, look at her eyes and not her bosom. If during the conversation she were to avert her eyes for even a second I could bounce my eyeballs off her chest and then put them back to eye level before she looked back. It's a great trick we men know. Unfortunately, Essy never looked away, meeting my eyes with a steady gaze for the time we said our obligatory hi-how-are-ya's. I think Essy was hip to the trick. After all, she's known me a long time.

Women do this; they put themselves in a situation where they command attention, but they don't want it. They want to be fashionable, and showing cleavage now is very chic, they just don't want guys drooling all over their chests. I can't blame them for that, but wonder why they might be offended if they caught somebody looking. My personal feeling is women know exactly how they look in the clothes they're wearing, so if they're showing boobies, they want someone to look. Maybe they just don't want me to look. Or maybe they do.

It makes for a tightrope-walking act for us guys! We'd like to be like the guy in the hilarious New Yorker cartoon on top, just go over and check 'em out. That isn't the way it works, though. Not in these days of sexual harassment.

I've written about this before here.

I've been going through the snapshots taken with my Male Mental Camera, going back to last summer, when the skin was showing all over the place. There's a nice chick in a red low-cut top…and hey, that gal over there in blue has quite a set, and she's showing most of 'em. Ooooo, looky here: this one has short-shorts and she's showing some butt cleavage, too! Oh man, I'm in heaven.