Saturday, January 29, 2011

"Very well proportioned..."

I watched Oprah yesterday, a show following up on stories done over several years by Oprah about strange or bad marriages. In the case of actress Fran Drescher, her story is that after she divorced her husband, Peter Marc Jacobson, in 1999, he confessed to her he was gay.

So...OK. They seem to have lived through the trauma of divorce and now they talk about this aspect of their lives. I thought, "Why do people confess such intimate secrets? Why would I want to know whether Fran Drescher's ex is gay?" If you haven't seen comic actress Drescher before, she is a very pretty woman who opens her mouth and talks in a nasally voice that is nails on a chalkboard. Her laugh is enough to chase me out of a room. Frankly, I'm not sure how he survived being married to her as long as he did, gay or not.

Drescher explained she and Peter met when they were 15. They had been together since they were kids, growing up together. She was faithful to him, and during their marriage hadn't had sex with other men. When they divorced she had other relationships. That's when she said to the audience and to him that until she was with other men she didn't realize her ex was "very well proportioned." That's a euphemistic way of saying he has a large penis.

She was grinning ear to ear when she said that. He looked at her with kind of a sick smile, like, "Woman, you've embarrassed me once again." How much information is too much information?

It reminded me, because one thing always leads to something else in my brain, of what I had heard about the late Frank Sinatra, that he was "very well proportioned." Sinatra called his penis "Little Frankie," and wore special underwear to accommodate it.

From 1946. Is Frank smiling because he's thinking about Little Frankie?

Guys can obsess about the size of their penises. I don't know why anyone would talk about it on a syndicated talk show, but Drescher seemed more than willing to share that information. I don't remember Sinatra coming out on stage and talking about Little Frankie. Or maybe he did and I missed it, thank god.

While we're on the topic, here's some hidden porn from Life magazine, 1967:

1 comment:

Kirk Jusko said...

"Frankly, I'm not sure how he stayed married to her as long as he did, gay or not."

Is it possible she sounded like a man in the dark?