Monday, November 19, 2007

Package delivery

This is one of those things that circulates around; I got it in a photocopied form. I counted the number of F's and came up with three. I gave it to a teacher friend and she counted six. She also patiently explained to me, "People don't look at words like 'of'." I hadn't even seen those words, and I consider myself pretty sharp. So does this mean I've got Alzheimer's, and need to be placed in the nursing home with my mom?

Arrgh. The aging process can get a guy down. This morning I woke up and headed for the medicine chest and the Advil. Amazing how arthritis can make getting out of bed difficult, when the feet hit the floor, and the floor hits back.

I was going through some old books, and came across my copy of Atlas Of Human Anatomy For The Artist by Stephen Rogers Peck. I scanned a picture of the aging process in men.I bought the book in 1970, when I was closer in age to the guy on the left. Now I'm midway between the guy in the middle and the guy on the right. The most disheartening thing is that people shrink. It's not like I can afford to give away half a head of height when I don't have that much head to begin with.

The best part is that apparently--according to the author/artist--the package in front looks pretty much the same from 18 to 80. And if you think about it, shrinking the rest will make that package look bigger! So much for those penis enlarging pills they're always trying to sell over the Internet. All I've gotta do is age another 20 years and I'll have a willie like a pornstar.

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